Just registered for the Challenge Paguera Triathlon. For those who don't know about half distance triathlon, that's 1.9km swim in the sea, 90km bike with some hills, 21km run (also not completely flat). I'm hoping for something around 5 hours of pain. For those who don't know me, I'm a former elite Spanish Champion in this distance. 4h20m in Valencia 2012. And it was f*** windy that day. For those who don't know me, I used to be one of the best triathletes in my country for several years. I used to train professionally morning and evening. I USED TO.
So, here's the challenge: To enjoy my fitness.
And I'm writing it down now so that every time I get scared about it, I can go back and read this to remind myself of the reasons why I decided to pay 265€ for this.
I'm doing this because for many years since I quit professional training, I've been hating my body; hating myself for not being fit and also hating myself for not being consistent with any training. A part of me will always want to be a World champion and will never get over the fact that I can't never be one because it's too late for me.
I keep going on and on in my mind for how I left elite training and why. I wanted to learn more about life, to live more, to work, to earn money, to be on vacation, to drink a beer whenever I wanted, to spend time loving, to party hard. But I regret being fearful of hard training, what eventually got me out of it. I regret the fear of feeling tired. I regret not being able to achieve balance in my life.
So for the fact that I don't want to keep hating my body and settle down with ageing, I challenge myself to be fit enough to be able to do this half distance triathlon and enjoy it.
I challenge myself to become the woman I want to be. I won't have hopes of winning it, I won't have hopes of being in the podium, I won't have hopes of any other thing than being able to have a weekly routine of training and achieve a fitness I can be happy with.
The truth is, in the past, I've been able to achieve hard goals because, I never thought that I couldn't do them. I didn't knew how hard they were so I just did them as best as I could.